I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize
