You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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