If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Randomize
