dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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