Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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