Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
