if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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