Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
