you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize