I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
