Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
i was born a porn star she said
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Redeem this text for a blowjob
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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