we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
