Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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