one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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