I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Randomize
