I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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