watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
i now understand why vodka
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
