weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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