you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
