He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I wish i was in the wii world.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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