Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
