I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
