K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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