so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
