in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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