It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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