you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
