So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize