She said her name was "party"
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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