i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
