Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize