It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
