drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
