Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
