Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
