Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize