Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize