Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Randomize
