you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
