Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
