You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize