I like to think it a success when the cops are called
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
There's always time for handjobs
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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