I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
