Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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