You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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