i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize