i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
