I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
