Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
