come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
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