I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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