okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
