So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
